"He is there not only when we cry out from the burden of sin but also when we cry out for any other reason." -Bruce D. Porter

Thursday, April 2, 2015

On the Road to Recovery (and a confession)

So the number one thing about a mental illness is acceptance. If you don't believe one doctor, get a second opinion. So after 4 doctors telling me that I have Bipolar 2, I think it's safe to say I need to accept it. Yes, I spent another week in a psychiatric hospital after my mood swings were getting to intense to handle. I was in denial about the Bipolar. I had myself convinced all it was was anxiety and depression. A lot of it is stigma. But it's the stigma I've created myself. So while I agree there is no magic pill to make us happy, for those of us with Bipolar, psychosis, or schizophrenia, there are drugs to help manage it. Therapy is still key in dealing and thriving.  I feel more in control now.  It took me three days at the hospital to accept the fact that I needed to accept  my Bipolar. After that, and a positive attitude, things started to get better. I've been  able to function. I was scared to come home because of the stresses of life. But I was wrong. I feel so much better at home, like I can handle things now. I'm also beginning to feel more satisfaction in the things I do. Is everything perfect now? No, I still get anxious. But it's not nearly as bad. I'm excited for the future. I believe I am on the road to recovery.